Monday, August 07, 2006

Important Email!!!!

Well, I finally gave in - I actually spent time reading one of those forwards you're always getting from friends. I often just don't have time to read junk mail, but some of these are actually kinda funny when you stop and think about it.

Only in America....
do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke!
do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten & buns in packages of eight.
do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

EVER WONDER .....
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a "broker"?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

why do we park our cars in driveways, and drive our cars on parkways??

Anonymous said...

Why does your blog admin delete anti-AU comments???

Jonathan Sutton said...

Please refer to comment #3 in "AUsome Time - Part 2".

Anonymous said...

Please refer to comment #4 in "AUsome Time - Part 2".

PS - I love you Jonathan